Summahtime Playlist

Well, it’s been a while. Lot’s to catch up on, but mostly (and inspired by Grburbank’s prompt summer list) I wanted to share my summer playlist. There are a lot more lady rockers on here than I’ve previously listened to, but there is so much fantastic lady-music out there right now!

1. “Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele: this lady can sing and I’m hooked on this song. She’s 23. Her voice gives me chills. She writes her own music. She’s phenomenal, as are her old albums.

2. “Paris (Ooh la la)” by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals. Um, swoon? This lady can rock it. I’ll just say it: she’s hawt.

3. “Drumming” by Florence + the Machine. The whole Lungs album is just fantastic. Just like Grace Potter, Florence Welch totally brings it. So many excellent songs: “Blinded” is probably my second favorite. “There’s a drumming noise inside my head / That throws me to the ground / I swear that you should hear it /It makes such an all mighty sound  / Louder than sirens / Louder than bells / Sweeter than heaven / And hotter than hell.” I love the lyrics and I love feeling this way around a man I’m truly attracted to.

4. “Home” by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros. Are you prepared for an uncharacteristically sappy post from me? When I hear this song, I hope that one day I will sillily dance in a sunlit kitchen with my husband to this music. They are so so good in concert (saw them with Mumford & Sons a few months ago). I love this happy happy song.

5. “Down by the Water” by The Decemberists. I don’t normally find singles to be the best songs on an album, but I love this one. The King is Dead is now my favorite Decemberists album. I feel like their sound has really come together and coalesced beautifully. I’m also excited to see them for FREE next week! Thanks, SLC!

6. “25 to Life” by Eminem. (Warning about the explicit lyrics.) I’ve always liked Eminem. Say what you will, but one thing the man does is write honest music. Recovery is by far my favorite album. I really love his examination of the negativity in co-dependent relationships, like in “Love the Way You Lie” with RhiRhi. I specifically like this song because he calls himself out on addictions and wait for it, even though you think he’s talking about a woman, he’s talking about the machine of hip-hop and how it kind of destroyed his life. Smart lyricist, that Marshall Mathers.

7. “Two of the Lucky Ones” by The Droge and Summer Blend. I got this little diddy from the Zombieland soundtrack. Over the past few years, I’ve really developed a love for folk music. Such a good song. “When all the work is done / By the light of the setting sun / We see what we’ve become / Two of the lucky ones.”

8. “Holocene” by Bon Iver. Favorite song off of their new album, but “Blood Bank,” “Re: Stacks,” and “Skinny Love” will always have my heart.

9. “Say” by John Mayer. Not a huge fan of him in real life, but he makes good music. Really good music. I always liked this song, and then I saw a clip of him on Sesame Street, which I have thoughtfully provided for you, and he sang this song to kids who were struggling to cope with military moms and dads coming home with war wounds from Iraq. Melted my icy heart. And I think the message is awesome – how great would life be if people could be honest and say what they felt? And for it to be okay to say what you really want?

10. “Down on Me” by Jeremiah featuring 50 Cent. Is this song terrible? Yes. Yes it is. But a white lady’s got to shake it to something, and for that reason, I love this song.

Honorable mention: Take Care, Take Care, Take Care by Explosions in the Sky (the whole album), “My Body” by Young the Giants, “Clean” by Incubus (okay, not new, but their new album is out soon and it’s my favorite song of theirs), “Paperweight” by Schuyler Fisk and Joshua Radin, “Lay Me Down” by The Dirty Heads featuring Rome, and “Turning Tables” by Adele.

Other things I love about summahtime? Listening to Sublime. Being home in Utah. ATV rides into the mountains and through rivers. Family everyday. Sassafras is back. Clean air. Great friends. Super 8. Awesome concerts. Delicious food. HARRY EFFING POTTER.

Updated Thesis

My dear friend Chani pointed out, a few months ago actually, that I had made errors in my thesis upload. Here’s the new, shiny, and correct version!

FinalTwilightThesis

“Hermano” is Spanish for “Brother”

Just so y’all know, I have the best brother in the world. No. Really. He wins.

Jimmy is in touch with both his feminine and bleached-hair side.

I remember the day Jimmy was born. In fact, it is one of my most vivid memories from my young childhood. When my mom went into labor, I packed my pink suitcase up and when to my Papa Dale and Nonnie Schmidt’s house. I had been fascinated with my mom’s pregnancy for the most part and now that there was a baby, I was convinced it was going to be the greatest event EVER. My dad called from the hospital and said it was a boy and I jumped up and down for joy and I couldn’t wait to meet the little fella. And then, they brought Jimmy home from the hospital. And he proceeded to cry for three – 3! – months. And my feelings changed about having a younger brother. I always loved my brother, but since there was a five year difference and I was the cool older sister (obviously) that he always wanted to hang out with, I was a much less tolerant, patient, and loving sister than I ought to have been. I always recognized that Jimmy was an awesome brother – was wonderful, giving, and warmhearted – I couldn’t be bothered in my selfish teenage years to give him the attention he deserved. Though our family has always been close and loving, when I left for college is when mine and Jimmy’s relationship really developed.

Jimmy and me at his graduation from high school

Exactly when and how Jimmy became one of my best friends escapes me, but I am forever grateful that he is. Jimmy is one of my closest confidants and our relationship has become stronger than most of my other relationships in the past eight years. I can go to my little brother for anything and he always accepts, supports, and loves me. I am continually amazed at his ability to see through my problems and offer me the advice I need to hear and will ultimately benefit from. Jimmy and I play Call of Duty, hike, eat, laugh, Christmas Tree hunt, and pretty much enjoy life together. I would rather spend time with him than most other people, because, frankly, he’s so frakkin’ awesome.

Hiking in Kannarville Falls

I am so proud of the man my brother is and is becoming. He is honorable and kind, patient and ambitious, objective and somehow emotionally engaged. Jimmy, though I hate having a debate with him, has an incredible mind for politics and economics. I love that he is passionate about his views and can so easily articulate his feelings and how his thoughts tie into the greater problems of today’s economy and government. One of the most important traits, that I respect the most about my brother, is his ability to admit his faults, mistakes, and shortcomings, be brutally honest about himself, and then find the inner strength to change himself and refuse to stay stagnant. He is becoming the kind of man people say don’t exist anymore. Jimmy is moral, chivalrous, kind, cultured, and intrepid.

Best brother/sister picture EVAH!

It seems like society expects that the older sibling should be a good influence on the younger. I’m pretty sure that Jimmy has always been the great influence to me. I am so blessed to have the family I do, and I am especially blessed to have a brother is wonderful as mine. Love ya, hermano!

C. Joe Willis

(Yes, I am VERY behind in the delivery of my electronic Christmas presents because I got caught up in the amazingness that is home and family over the break. So, those of you who are to come, be grateful you’re gettin’ somma this, mmmmkay?)

Joe likes animals!

What can I say about this man? Well, a lot actually, but I should probably start from the beginning. Joe and I were taking classes in SUU’s English Department at the same time, but never actually had classes together until we were Basic Writing Assistant’s for an English 1000 class. On this particular day, before we were going to take our groups outside for a game, Joe leaned forward and said, “Hey, you know what would be hilarious? If I tackled you when we’re on the grass down there.” And, instead of thinking, Who the eff does this creeper think he is?, I said, “That would be UH-MAZING! You should totally do it!” So, when push came to shove (hardy har har!), Joe tackled me not just on the grass, but down the slope in the grass causing us to look like ginormous asses, but fun-loving asses, in front of all of our students. From that day on, C. Joe Willis and I were the best of friends.

C. Joe and Slarue funtimes at the zoo!

There are so so many things I love about Joe. But since we’re film dorks, I’m gonna break it down to a Top 5 list à la High Fidelity. So, the “Top 5 Things I Love About Crazy Joe Willis”: one, I love that he is unfailing kind, thoughtful, and empathetic. Joe is always willing to see others’ perspectives and tries to understand them where other people might write someone who is “different” or “awkward” off. Joe continually sees people as they really are, and the best in who they are. Two, I love that Joe is one of the main reasons I love comic books. “Comic books? Pff. Lame,” you say? I thought so too until Joe encouraged me to take a visual narratives class with him and my world changed. Comic books may sound like a trite reason to love someone in and of themselves, but Joe’s love for comic books has shaped his moral character, his ability to carry on despite what others think, and even his career path: these are things I love about Joe. Third, I love that Joe is a dork, a geek, and a nerd. And I don’t use these words in the new sense of the “cool-hispter-I’m-such-a-geek-I-fit-in-with-everyone-else” sense of the word. I use it in the sense that Joe is okay with being different and dorky. He pays attention to things that truly interest him though others might think them lame or dorky. Fourth, I love that Joe is always always always there for me. Joe and I have the same freak-out mode and luckily, we are usually freaking out at different times so our freak-outs don’t knock the earth of its axis. Because Joe understands what I am feeling, he’s great at talking me through things when I am truly bothered. And because he is so kind and empathetic, he is always able to help me make decisions according to my morals and beliefs and never imposes his morals and beliefs on me. He holds me accountable to myself and thus helps me grow. And five, Joe has excellent taste in movies, music, books, and things to laugh at. We wouldn’t be friends if this were so.

"What do ya do... with a B.A. in English? F**k, it sucks to be me!"

I am so proud of Joe and everything he has accomplished. He is a professor at SUU and is allowing himself to become the man he wants to be: not the man others expect him to be. He laughs easily and has overcome more hurt, betrayal, and failed expectations than I ever have: and what’s more is that he is a better man for it. I am proud that Joe hasn’t allowed his failed expectations to rule his life and has learned that expectations often get us to a place where we can alter our course in becoming who we want to be. Joe is a amazing man and I am forever grateful he is and will be in my life.

Doesn't he look so excited to be in a limo with me?

You’re the Sh*t and I’m Knee Deep in It

Tonight’s post is dedicated to one Brittany Knotts. Brittany was one of the first friends I made when I moved here from Arizona, and I’m so thankful to say that she has become one of my best friends in a very short amount of time. We both serve in our Singles Ward Relief Society Presidency (and for you non-Mormon readers, no, I’m not going to define that – just go ahead and google it). We serve in a capacity where we had to get to know each other on a pretty personal level very quickly and we soon realized that we were going to be awesome friends.

Sadly, the only picture I have of us. Taken on my 25th birthday at the Frightened Rabbit concert.

To me, honesty is the most important aspect of any relationship. Without honesty in communication and self, I cannot trust people. As such, there are so many things I love about this girl and first and foremost is her genuine and tenacious honesty. With Brittany, you never have to worry about where you stand. While she is kind and gracious, she is always candid about her feelings, experiences, strengths, and imperfections. I never have to worry about any judgement when I share my life with her because she is so utterly accepting of others and appreciates their honesty. I love that I can be myself, flaws and talent, whenever I am with her. Nothing is forced.

I also love that Brittany is passionate about her ideals and causes. She will fight tooth and nail for the principles she believes in and she makes me wish I had the courage to be as dogged as she. She is also willing to test herself and her principles for the sake of self-improvement and growth, more qualities that take courage to implement into life. Beyond this, Brittany is able to find humor and joy in life. Though she acknowledges her struggles, she looks for ways to be happy instead of wallow in self-pity. She is a fiercely loyal friend and helps me to accept myself, my trials, and my strengths so that I can become a better person.

Brittany is absolutely fabulous and I am continually grateful that she is in my life to stay. We’re musical soul mates (thanks again for appreciating Scottish folk music on my birthday with me!), movie gurus, goofballs, and each others’ sounding board. Thanks for everything, lady. I sure do love ya!

Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday.

<3,

Slarue

My Dear Rae

I remember the first time I saw Rae English. It was in Jim Aton’s World Literature I class. Since I thought, in my undergrad naivety, that the class was a snooze fest, I rarely did my reading. I had noticed that the woman in the middle row, with long beautiful hair, ALWAYS did the reading and ALWAYS had comments. However, she wasn’t like those know-it-alls who HAD to say something to be validated. Rae could always thoughtfully synthesize literature and gave insights I found helpful. The first time Rae spoke to me, she complimented my beauty (her words, not mine) and MY thoughtful responses in class. This specific experience relays much about Rae’s personality: it takes a confident and bold soul to approach someone he or she does not know and express such sincere kindness.

Rae & I on my first limo ride in Pittsburgh

Since that day, Rae has continued to amaze me with her wisdom, strength, and ability to be completely at ease with her strengths and her weaknesses. Through our travels around the country with STD, I’ve learned to get out of my comfort zone and experience some of the most memorable times in my life. Rae and I have been to Flagstaff to meet Lemony Snicket, Pittsburgh, Southern California, St. Louis, Louisville, and Minneapolis. In those places, we’ve been to the Andy Warhol museum, fantastic restaurants with the BEST roast beef au jeux, gay bars, Drag Queen shows, literary landmarks, comic book shops, more restaurants, films, clothes shopping, city explorations, lectures, presentations, and to more autographing tables with famous authors sitting around than I can count. Though there have always been others with us, I am always grateful that Rae is there and make my experience more rich, meaningful, and memorable.

I've tried to stick with just photos of the person I'm writing about and me, but I just love this photo soooo much!

There are so many aspects of Rae that endear her to my heart. One of the most important to me is her ability to be a fierce, loving, and honorable mother. I have been blessed with so many great mother figures in my life, and Rae ranks up at the top with my mother. She continually sacrifices for and loves her children. She has raised her daughters to be strong, empathetic, and intelligent. She has taught them to be their own women, which is a talent Rae has of her own – without a doubt, Rae is the kind of woman who liberates other women from their own insecurities and stereotypes. Also, Rae loves to laugh, and I know y’all know how much I love to laugh. Sometimes people are thrown off by how loud I can be when I laugh, but Rae is not like that. We are usually the loudest laughers in the room, and it’s fabulous.

Waiting for an author's panel to begin at STD

Beyond being an amazing mother, Rae is an incredible intellectual and author, a fantastic cook and entertainer, a source of warmth and love, a wonderful decorator and dresser, and a phenomenal friend. She is a source of joy to be around. She has helped me realize the woman I want to become by encouraging me to find myself in terms of faith, gender, and academia. She was there for me when I was at rock bottom and she never judged me for my decisions or for the reasons I was hurting.

Merry Christmas, my dear friend. I wish I could be in St. Louis with you, snuggled in your bed – my favorite bed in the world – giggling at youtube videos.

 

Grburbank

It’s true: I have fallen a day behind in my Christmas project. But I am glad because I’ve had extra time to think about this entry, which is really great considering that the person I am writing about would likely have taken extra time before writing his thoughts. The more I ponder this particular endeavor of mine, the more I realize I have been blessed with an incredible amount of extraordinary people in my life. I might have to go further than Christmas in order to meet the demands. That said, meet Gregory Burbank: librarian, English major, and friend extraordinare.

Excited Grburbank and Slarue!

I feel bad in saying that I do not remember the exact moment I met Gregory, but I do love that he slowly, steadily, and quietly came into my life in a way that leads me to believe he will never leave for the way our friendship created bonds. The way Gregory entered my life is very indicative of his persona and energy. Gregory, though I sometimes think he doubts it, is a rock. He may appear to be quiet, but he is teeming with life. His words, though sometimes rare, are incredibly thoughtful, well-chosen, and often profound. He amazes me with his understanding of complex literature and his ability to articulate the most beautiful arguments and viewpoints. I love that Gregory does not say something he does not mean, on any sort of scale. He could be talking about the weather of the day or the state of the human condition and each sentence would be chosen with thoughtfulness and clarity. I love Gregory for becoming the man he wants to be and moving away from expectations of others and relying on his own expectations of himself. I love that he moved to Seattle to pursue his dreams.

At a pub in Minneapolis

During my last year in Cedar City, Gregory was a place I would often go to for solace…. and for a film-watching buddy. When he moved away before my year was complete, a part of my heart went with him. I went from seeing him everyday to seeing him only a one or two times a year. Even though this trend continues, my heart is ALWAYS happy when I get to see him. Gregory helped me appreciate a new kind of cinema and helped move my mind from the analytical and concrete closer the the abstract and creative.

Fancy Slarue and Grburbank

Gregory is the kind of observational soul I want to be. He sees beauty all around him and in the people in his life, and I so thankful he has helped me understand that I must take the time to do the same in my own life.